Dear Doctor
by GSRgirlforever
Summary: 10/Rose After Rose is trapped once more in the alternate universe she finds a way to comunicate through a journal. What she doesn't know it that the Doctor she left behind can read it, only two years in the past. The rating is just in case.
1. Chapter 1

_Dear Doctor,_

_I've lost you again. For the second time in my life I stood on that beach and mourned the loss of you. But this time I was not alone, you stood beside me, holding my hand as the TARDIS escaped my life once more. You couldn't say the words, but he could. He is you, so why couldn't you say them?_

_You stood beside me and watched as you left us behind to live a life I never wanted without you. How can I go on with this duplicate, living my life from day to day with a human version of the man I grew to love traveling through time and space?_

_Out of love for you I will make a life, but I will still think of you, traveling in the TARDIS. I will think of the room I left behind there, of the times we spent running and the wars we won, the people we saved._

_I hope you still travel with Donna, she is your other half now, part Time Lord part human, as you are to me now. You're asleep right now. It feels strange to have you sleeping beside me while I write. You're here, but then again you aren't._

Rose looked at the words she had written on the page, a letter to the man she would never see again, and see every day. She closed the book and placed it in the table next to her before rolling over and inspecting him.

It was odd to watch him as he slept, the only other time she had this luxury was when he had regeneration sickness. He was the same man as then, only different. She noticed the changes, how could she not.

He carried himself a little differently, his voice fluctuating just a little differently then before. She reached over and swept aside a lock of hair that lay on his forehead. He smiled in his sleep and she couldn't help but smile herself.

She had her Doctor, and in a way, he had her. She thought once more to the real Doctor, to the one still traveling through time and space. As she gazed at the man in front of her, she could imagine clearly the man who left her behind.

She questioned if she could go through life, living with this man at her side when the real Doctor was still without her. For him she would try.

The Doctor looked around at the different shops, trialing behind Rose as she jumped from one thing to the next. She always loved it when he brought her to these little out of the way planets, with their strange shops and unknown treasures.

He noticed a shop with books and headed over to look, Rose was off looking at some trinkets. The shopkeeper was a little woman with eyes that spoke of age and knowledge. He glanced at the titles in front of him, taking them in and picking the ones he found interesting up and giving them a better look.

"Find anything you like?" the shopkeeper asked.

"Na, just lookin'" he replied while glancing sideways at Rose a couple stalls down.

"I have just the thing for you" the little lady announced and shoved two books in his hands. He gave them a look and smiled. On the cover was a rose, pressed into what looked like blue leather, almost the exact same color as the TARDIS.

"What are they?" he asked, opening one up and looking inside, nothing but blank pages.

"Journals" she replied, "one for you…one for your lady there" and she looked over at Rose. The Doctor looked from the book over to Rose as well. She looked up at the same time and they exchanged a smile.

"I'll take them" he said and paid the woman, slipping them in his pocket.

Him and Rose spent the rest of that day walking around, taking in the sights and enjoying the day. It was rare they ever got to do it. When they entered the TARDIS several hours later Rose retired to her room and the Doctor took a seat in the control room.

He pulled out one of the journals and looked at it, the rose seemed to leap out of the cover at him. He stared at it for a moment before opening the cover and looking inside once more. When he looked inside there was writing there. Curious he began to read, and as he did so, he couldn't believe what he was reading.

He looked from the book to the door Rose had disappeared behind, and then back at the book. He flipped through the book and a letter fell out. He picked it up off the floor and began to read it.

_To the user of these journals,_

_All that needs to be done to communicate from one to the other is to write within its pages and the other will be able to read._

That was all there was, nothing else. He looked back at the page in the book and then pulled out the other. All its pages were blank. He looked back at the other one and read the letter again, his heart sank.

He was going to lose Rose.


	2. Chapter 2

Rose sat in bed and pondered her situation. It had been three weeks now since she had returned to this universe. This should have been one of the happiest times of her life, but she was strangely melancholy. It was times like this she thought of him, of what he must be doing.

It hurt less now, but she still wished things had been different. She pulled the journal out of her side table and opened it to the second page. After the first letter she had put it away and gone on with her life. This book made her feel closer to him somehow.

She put pen to paper and began to write.

_Dear Doctor,_

_It's been three weeks now in this universe. I still think of you often, though not every moment. Something happened today that I have been wanting for so long, and I should be happy about it, but for some reason I can't help but feel sad._

_You asked me to marry you today. It was just like you too. Nothing special was planned, no fancy dinner or dancing, and I loved it. We went to our favorite chip shop and in the middle of a bite you just spit it out._

_Will you marry me?_

_I naturally said yes, neither of us missing a beat in our meal. Though the smile you gave me did remind me of the countless times you used to smile at me after we got out of a scrape. That wide toothy smile I love so much. _

_It was after dinner and we were walking back to the flat that I thought of you. What were you doing then? Saving the world again I'm sure, but are you still alone? Is Donna with you? I hope she is, or if she isn't for some reason, I hope you've found someone._

_Someone to tell you when to stop, or to hold your hand when you need it. I miss you so much, and I love you. I always will._

DOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSE

The Doctor trudged through his ship, alone. The Cybermen and Daleks had managed to cruelly leave him on his own again. He did lose Rose, and right now he was utterly alone. His Rose was gone, stuck on another Earth in another universe.

DOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSEDOCTOROSE

"Rose Tyler…"

That was all was able to say to her before the link closed and they were separated forever. Tears ran down his face and he wiped them away. He never got to tell her how he really felt, he wasted time trying to be brave.

His chance was gone now, and he was never going to get it back. He was never going to be able to hug her or hold her hand. He was never going to be able to smell her shampoo or watch that little bit of tongue that stuck out when she was being cheeky.

It hurt, more than he ever thought it would. He made his way around the console and sat in the jumpseat, pulling the journal out of his pocket to look at again. The letter was still there, he read it whenever he had the chance, hoping it was wrong.

He closed his eyes and passed his hand over the etched rose again, the feel of it engrained in his memory. A future Rose was trapped in that parallel world, and a small part of him wished he had been sucked into the void with the rest. That way he wouldn't have to hurt so much.

He knew now it wasn't wrong. But it also gave him the hope that he would see her again. She said she had lost him again, but that means he would see her again as well. Even if for just a short time. When he opened the book though, there was another letter transcribed on the second page.

He read it carefully. She had mentioned a clone in the first letter and he was still trying to figure out what could have created a duplicate of him. Someone who was him, but not him, and who was this Donna she kept talking about? How was she half TimeLord?

The new letter told of something that surprised him even more.

He had asked her to marry him.


	3. Chapter 3

**I really hope you guys are liking this story, I'm a little worried about it. Let me know what you think.**

_Dear Doctor,_

_I know it has been a few weeks since my last letter, and I am sorry for that. Mum will not leave me alone about the wedding plans. You and I have agreed to just let her do all the work and we'll show up for the wedding. _

_I got fitted for my dress today, it's beautiful. You surprised me with a set of shoes just like yours, we both laughed at what mum's reaction's going to be. I'm going to wear them no matter what. There is something else I did today. Something I learned._

_I found out today I'm pregnant. I'm worried about your reaction, about how you're going to feel. I know you lost your family in the time war, and I want to help you remember them, but I also want to make a new family._

_I'm going to tell you on our honeymoon, we're going to Barcelona (the country, not the planet). I can't tell you how happy I am right now. Knowing I have a little piece of you growing inside me is something I have wanted for the longest time._

_I would never tell you this, but I have loved you from the moment you took my hand and said run. Now I have you for myself. We may not be running for our lives, or saving planets and civilizations, but we are together and creating a future._

_I love you so much._

_doctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosdoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctor_

The Doctor put the book away and tried to keep his emotions in check. At least he now knew who Donna was. It was strange to have someone know about his future when he had no idea. He thought Donna would stay with him, but she refused.

It surprised him. He thought she was meant to be a companion of his, but when he asked her to come with him, she said no. Once again he sat in the control room of the TARDIS and thought about the life his Rose was having without him.

As he watched Donna and her family dance at the reception for the wedding that never was, he remembered back to times when he had held Rose that way. He imagined what it would be like to be the one to marry her.

Now she was carrying another mans child, no, she was carrying his child. An unbidden smile came to his face at that thought. He wondered if it was a girl or a boy, if it would have her stubbornness or his intelligence.

It would be lucky, that much he knew. With her as a mother, there was no chance that child could feel anything but lucky.

_doctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctor_

_Doctor,_

_I picked up my dress today, hopefully I don't have to have it altered before the wedding. Last night we sat in front of the tele and fell asleep. I still have trouble sometimes with you sleeping so much. I'm not used to you nodding off on me all the time. Seems the human you needs a lot more._

_I got used to the lack of sleep. Most nights I sit in bed like tonight and watch you sleep. I often feel revived after four. Guess I got used to the lifestyle. I'm still thrilled about the baby and I just have the overwhelming feeling that it is going to be a girl._

_I can feel her in there growing. I know it sounds funny, but I can imagine what she looks like. I imagine it happened the first time we made love. I caught you by surprise on our third night together._

_You were ever the gentleman, but I just wasn't in the mood. No was not an option for me, and I have to say, you were a very willing partner. I'm rambling…starting to sound like you I suppose. Guess I should try and get some sleep._

_I love you_

_Doctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctorosedoctor_

The Doctor snapped the book shut and looked up, that was the fifteenth time he had read that letter. He still couldn't believe that he had voluntarily admitted himself into a human hospital. The lead doctor and what he could only assume to be a gaggle of med students had just entered the ward and was heading towards him.

Every time he opened the book there was another letter from Rose waiting for him and it thrilled him. He was usually high after he read one and they were keeping him going, keeping him from self destructing. They were saving him from himself.

And he loved her for it.

**Alright guys, your turn. I could really use some feedback here…**


	4. Chapter 4

**I am very sorry for taking so long to update this story. Life has just gotten in the way and I am trying to keep up. School will be out after next week and I will be able to write to my hearts content and actually post once in a while. Thanks for all the support and Enjoy the chapter.**

Rose stood in front of the mirror and looked at her reflection. Long had she thought of this day, and long had she thought of sharing it with him. The white dress was beautiful, and the secret plimsolls she wore under her dress were even more so.

Her mother despised the idea of her wearing them, but they were a gift from the Doctor and there was no way she was not going to wear them. Two months it had taken them to get to this point, to getting married.

Her mother wouldn't let her get away with a small wedding and Rose and the Doctor just let her have her way. They didn't care how it happened, just that it was happening.

"Oh, you're going to smudge your makeup if you cry" Jackie said, watching a tear make its way down her cheek.

"It's alright mum, he doesn't care."

Jackie gave a huff and left the room, "you're dads waitin" and closed the door behind her.

That was something else she never thought would happen, her father was walking her down the isle. Tony, her little brother, was the ring bearer. She was happy.

But still she was sad.

She couldn't help but think of him while she said her vows, and was reminded of him when he kissed her to seal them together as man and wife. He looked at her as if he knew, somehow knew what she was thinking at that moment.

And he showed her that he understood.

"You were the one who saved me from myself" he whispered in her hear "write to him."

"How?"

"I just know…don't worry, I would never invade your privacy. Just write to him."

He was still just as mysterious as ever, and she wouldn't have it any other way, but she trusted him with everything and did as he wished. She wrote to him.

DoctoroseDoctoroseDoctoroseDoctorose

_Dear Doctor,_

_It was beautiful. You wore the suit you were left in on that beach. It was natural to see you in it, though you seldom wear it any longer. You have grown to be quite a fan of jeans, must be Donna's influence. _

_It's strange Doctor, you are the one who told me to write to you. You have been such a wonderful man to me. Yesterday when we said our vows and the love you hold for me was shining in your eyes._

_I wanted to tell you then, the secret I have been keeping for two weeks now, but I waited until we were in bed. I thought you were going to explode with excitement. There was a gleam in your eye that I hadn't seen in a long time._

_I'm hoping it's a boy, with your unruly hair and sharp eyes. I have an appointment set for when we get back. Once again you're sleeping beside me, I just can't look at you enough. Forever isn't long enough for me._

_Love you_

Once again he closed the book, inwardly hoping the baby is a girl and has her eyes. The slight smile that played across his face did not go unnoticed by Martha. She was one of the gaggle of interns at the hospital.

He didn't know why, but she was somehow compelled to check the other side of his chest, where of course she found his other heart. He knew then, and when she saved his life, he would ask her to join him.

He took her back to meet Shakespeare, where it all went wrong again. He was reminded of Rose with everything they did. It had only been a short time for him then. Then there was Lazarus and his evil machine.

So much had happened in these past three months. Only her letters were keeping him going. Martha was a great person, but she just wasn't Rose.


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the next chapter for you guys, again sorry for the long wait. You know what to do at the end…it makes me happy to see reviews…**

_Dear Doctor,_

_I got the shock of my life today! I'm having twins, and not just any twins either. When they scanned me, they counted four hearts, four. I don't know how it happened. Dad had to have the doctors memory wiped and I've had another scan at Torchwood._

_You're beside yourself with worry right now. This should be impossible, your human, I'm human. I just don't understand. I have to go in for blood work tomorrow, they are going to check the babies and you're going to look at their blood._

_You won't let anyone else touch me or the babies. You keep telling me not to worry, but I know you are. There are questions in your eyes, and worry. I hope everything will be alright. With you by my side, I know it will be._

The Doctor couldn't handle this right now. He closed the book and shoved it back into his jacket. He sat inside the TARDIS on the seat in the control room, thinking about the last two months. He had just spent them as a human.

He had witnessed and felt what it would be like to be married and have a family. Martha was making it clear she was getting tired of being in Rose's shadow, but there wasn't anything he could do about it.

He was tired too. There was just so much standing in the way and he wanted so bad to hold Rose in his arms once more.

Being human and then turning back into himself had taken a toll on him, and now he was stuck in the past without his TARDIS. Martha complained daily about having to work to support the two of them while he tried to get the TARDIS back to them.

He did his best to keep upbeat about it, after all, he knew they were going to make it back. The evidence he had was proof enough of that. He read over the letter again and again, wishing he was there to comfort her.

In his mind he went over the implications of what was going to happen with the babies. Were they going to be alright, what if they were…he couldn't think about it. It was just too much. He needed to concentrate on getting the TARDIS back.

The next night while Martha slept he opened the book once more to read the letter again. When he got to the page there was another…

_Doctor,_

_I'm worried. I won't tell you this, but the look on your face scares me. It's like you know something I don't and you won't tell me. Is it that bad? Should I be worried or are you just being your normal contemplative self. I wish you would tell me. All you keep saying is to write. I think you think it's some kind of release for me, and in a way it is, but it doesn't make me worry any less. All I can do is write down the questions I want to ask, but am too afraid to._

The Doctor sat scrunch browed with the book on his lap, contemplating what could be going on. He wished he could talk to her, or to his other self, just to see what is really going on. He glanced back down at the page and noticed a mark he didn't see the first time.

He looked closer and saw the number 305. What could that mean? Thinking it over a minute he figured he understood and turned the pages of the book…there was another letter, but this time in his own neat scrawl.

_I know I shouldn't be doing this, and I also know you are worried. I am you after all. I will be erasing everything here after I'm done writing it, but I knew when to write it and wanted to give you some information. _

_Rose is fine. The babies are fine, but there is something you need to know. They only have TimeLord DNA. I don't know how, but I also know that Rose sleeps very little, even now, being pregnant and all. This will be hard for you to read but…I don't think Rose is the same…she changed somehow. She shouldn't be able to carry TimeLord children…but she is. _

_There is something else…she's stopped aging. The subtle ticking of her internal clock has slowed and her metabolism has skyrocketed. She still has one heart and shows no signs of bodily change, nor does she feel wrong like Jack did. I don't know how to put my finger on it, but I think it has something to do with the Time Vortex._

_I will keep you updated, same time and page every week. Keep track._

The Doctor took in a deep breath and by the time it was exhaled the letter was gone. No evidence of its existence remained, but he remembered every word. There was one thing he did know, with TimeLords in the other universe, it was going to be easier for him to get to Rose. Only he knew he couldn't do that.


	6. Chapter 6

**Again, sorry for the wait guys. School is out and I have little else besides kids and house to keep my busy…so I get to write more…yeah! Leave a review and let me know how you like the progression of the story…give me some feedback on how you would like things to progress. Would you like to see more from Rose's point of view?**

He had very little time to think of getting back to Rose right now. He had just managed to get the TARDIS back and was steering her to recharge in Cardiff while Martha spent some time in the confines of her room.

Twelve hours later and both the TARDIS and Martha seemed to be in better spirits. He was just lying in the new coordinates when the ship gave a great shudder and they were once again taken off course. Could nothing in his life go smoothly?

When they landed he sprinted out of the ship followed closely by Martha. That is when he saw Jack. The next few hours of his life he spent trying to reconcile what he had done to his one time companion while trying to save humanity once again.

Little did he know that the man he was helping was in fact a TimeLord.

Only once did he get the chance to open the journal he so loved to read, finding a moment of time away from everything and everyone he pulled it out and read over his favorite bits. He pulled himself away just in time to read the latest of the updates from his other self.

The Doctor now began to look forward to the weekly letters he was sending himself. They told him so much more than what he could get from Rose. He always told him how the babies were progressing, how their growth seemed to go along the same lines as those of TimeLord children.

How he could feel the unconscious link between them and himself. How large Rose's stomach was growing, and how he had stuck his mouth in his foot more than once in the past month or so. How the Jackie slap was an inherited talent and that he was not looking for a repeat performance.

Then one day he got a letter that stopped him in his tracks…

_You need to hide this book, and whatever you do, don't take it out. You will be tempted, but you mustn't. I can't tell you any more, but know that everything will work out. Keep it in your suit, deeply hidden._

He began to wonder what this could possibly mean when the words disappeared. Quickly he did as was advised, and not a moment too soon. Just after placing the journal in the far reaches of a hidden pocket events began to happen in rapid succession.

He learned in a horribly hard way that the elderly gentleman he had been so willingly helping was in fact, The Master. A TimeLord known to be insane and malicious. He didn't get back in time to save his ship and was forlorn to learn he was once more without her.

Jack managed to save the day in a way, transporting them back to the one other place besides the end of the universe he knew the Master would be…and so a new adventure began for him. One that he would not be able to exit unscathed.

DoctoroseDoctoroseDoctoroseDoctoroseDoctoroseDoctorose

Once again Rose looked at the man sleeping beside her. Instead of needing more and more sleep as the pregnancy progressed, she needed less and less. At first she thought it must be the nature of the pregnancy. After all, she had slept little since traveling with the Doctor.

But now she was certain there was something else happening, she was changing, and she was certain he knew this. Why did he keep it from her then? Was he worried she might not make it through whatever transformation her body was going through.

Maybe he didn't know enough to divulge information to her. He always was one to double check everything before even saying a word to her. But he seemed happy these past few months. The wedding, the children, they all brought a new life to his eyes she had never seen before.

She continued to write in her journal, documenting her experiences as the children inside her grew. How she loathed the size of her stomach and how he teased her once for her waddle, earning him a slap that rivaled her mothers.

She smiled at that memory, and then smiled wider as she inspected the man beside her again. Subtle changes were making their way out as time progressed. His middle began to fill out a bit, no longer losing the weight as fast as he once did.

He wasn't fat, but thicker. He began to exercise more as soon as he found this out and his body was steadily becoming tone instead of wiry. He still looked like her doctor, the same dark brown eyes and unruly hair.

He still bounced on the balls of his feet in impatience as he waited for something exciting to happen. His mind still ran a mile a minute as he messed his hair in concentration. His face was more filled, but still defined as it used to be. And his smile…the smile was still the same.

He was still her Doctor.

His hair, that was the big change. Even though she had been seeing the changes over time, it still took her by surprise one day when she looked up at him. She smiled again and pulled out her journal…

_Dear Doctor,_

_I don't think I've ever seen you more happy. You've turned ginger! Your hair began changing about three months ago. I noticed the difference when you stood in the sun, your hair seeming to almost catch fire as the rays hit it. _

_You said it must have something to do with the metacrisis, somehow a delayed reaction to your body. I think it has something to do with Donna again. How could it not, she was ginger too. It just makes sense. _

_You've always wanted to be ginger, and now you are. You stop in front of every mirror you pass and look at yourself, that huge smile crossing your face every time. It makes me laugh every time._


	7. Chapter 7

**I know it has taken me a great deal of time to get this out to you, but I'm sure the wait was worth it. Please read the note at the end of this chapter, it has some important information on where the story is going.**

Rose sniggered to herself once more as she witnessed the Doctor gazing at himself in the mirror yet again. Still her Doctor. She stood there and watched as he ran his fingers through the mess of hair, his eyes gleaming in wonder. In all his 900 plus years, he had never been ginger. It seemed like he just couldn't get enough now.

He glanced at her through the edge of his eyes, watching her as she watched him. He knew he was being a bit self absorbed, but really he wasn't. He actually spent most of his time monitoring her through the connection they had through the children.

Just then he was suddenly overwhelmed with a sense of urgency and stood up, looking over at Rose. She was smiling at him, her hands both placed on her protruding stomach. She was ten months along now, and he had been running blind for months.

He knew why there was no store of information for him to fall back on right now, the book. It was at this time he was living one of the worst years of his life. His other self was right now trapped as the pet of the Master, unable to read the weekly messages.

He let a shiver run down his spine with the memory of it and hated the fact that he was out of communication from himself, and especially Rose. It was that year, spent in a constant concentration of communication with the ship that he really felt the loss of Rose.

She often crept into his mind, delivering a more severe dose of depression than anything the Master could. One piece of solace he gleamed during his year of hell was the fact that Rose was trapped in that other universe, this universe. He was suddenly ripped out of his thoughts when he heard Rose let out a low hiss beside him.

She was leaning against the wall for support and looked as if she was about to pass out.

"Rose?" he called out as he ran to her side just in time to catch her in his arms. It was times like this he was thankful for the extra muscle he had acquired.

"I think" she gasped out before the both of them witnessed the seat of her pants grow dark with liquid. Oh Crap!

"Rose, we need to get you to torchwood" he stated and led her to the car. He hated driving. It was too slow and he really hated it right now. Rose needed to get to torchwood fast, he didn't know how quickly this was going to go. He hated not knowing.

Lack of knowledge was something that always took the Doctor by surprise, but in most cases it also gave him a measure of thrilled anticipation. This time there was only the nagging feeling of worry to accompany the lack of knowledge pertaining to their current situation. It was positively aggravating.

Rose currently lay on a bed barely controlling the pain she was in. They were too afraid to administer any medication in case the babies had a reaction to them. At this point he wasn't sure if Rose wouldn't have a reaction to them, her body had changed so much.

He desperately wished there was something he could do for the pain, but they just couldn't take the chance. She knew this and was taking it all in stride, even though her face contorted every five minutes into one of agonizing pain. It nearly tore him in half.

He monitored her vitals carefully as the labor progressed, his brow creased in worry he just couldn't hide any longer. The team he had hand picked with the help of Rose's father was surrounding her, helping to encourage and monitor in any way they could.

He had tried to replicate a pain medication from his home, but he couldn't find anything that was close enough to fabricate it. By the time her contractions were a minute apart she was profusely sweating with the effort it took to control herself.

Through all of it the babies kept a steady link with him, the little hum at the back of his mind telling him everything was alright. He made sure to inform Rose of their progress, but she seemed to be unsurprised by his information, as if she knew.

Maybe she did know… they were growing in her. Maybe she had changed enough to feel that connection as well. He would have to ask her later, for now he had to focus on her and delivering these babies safely.

Hours passed and her labor progressed, steadily her body readied to deliver them. It took little time for the first to be born, a girl. She was beautiful with head full of dark hair and plump baby cheeks and a pouty mouth.

He handed her off to Rose who held her close, counting toes and fingers as tears slipped from her eyes. The Doctor looked on with tears in his own eyes, the overwhelming feeling of family surrounding him like it hadn't in hundreds of years.

He managed to pry the baby from her hands just as another contraction ripped its way through her body. He reluctantly handed her off to one of the nurses to help with the delivery of the second child.

The delivery of the second baby was just as quick as the first, this time a boy, and he was thankful it was over. Once the infants were cleaned and checked, both sporting strong double heartbeats, Rose and the Doctor were left to enjoy the bubble of love enveloping them.

**IMPORTANT~ Please read**

**Alright guys, the next few chapters are going to be like this. The Doctor is living inside the hell year and is unable to read the weekly updates from the other Doctor as well as not being able to read letters Rose had written during this time. **

**Once he is free from this year he will be able to catch up with the letters and therefore the next chapters will be based on the letters she wrote during that time. Although that episode was called the "The Year that Never Was" the Doctor, his companions, and everyone on the valiant were excluded from not living it.**

**This includes the diary, everything that Rose wrote in the book during that year has been stockpiling and the Doctor will be able to read it. He will also be one year closer to the same time that Rose and the other Doctor.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry for the delay guys, I have been having a hell of a time with writers block. Enjoy this chapter.**

The Doctor sat in the chair next to Rose and watched her nurse their son as he held their daughter. Jackie and Pete had stopped by shortly after they were born, but didn't stay long. There was a smile playing across his face that spoke of the sheer love he felt for the other three people in the room.

He looked down at his daughter and he smirked over the name Rose had insisted they name her. He almost rolled his eyes at the suggestion, but also thought is was fitting. Her name was Donna. Their son was a different matter, though no less amusing. His name was John.

John and Donna, two names already known through time and space in another universe, and fittingly used for two unique individuals in this one.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Rose whispered.

"I was just thinking about their names" he let out a little chuckled and Rose gave him a smile.

"I had your mother bring your journal with her" he mentioned, nodding his head at the table next to her. She raised a questioning brow at him and he shrugged, "thought you might want to write about Donna and John."

She picked up the journal and laid it on her lap before tracing her fingers across the deeply impressed rose on the blue cover. Somehow she always felt closer to the Doctor while she was writing in it. She could never explain the feeling and she knew it was directed to Him.

She took in a deep breath, "I miss him."

The Doctor didn't look up from his sleeping daughters face, "I know."

It wasn't something they ever talked about. It wasn't a sore subject and the Doctor knew she loved him very much, they were the same man after all.

"At least he has Donna" she said, smiling down at John. There was no reply from the Doctor and she looked up to find him sitting with slumped shoulders, the smile no longer on his face even though he was still looking at Donna.

"Is there something wrong?"

He looked up quickly and once again the smile was on his face, though it didn't reach his eyes. "No, nothings wrong. I was just thinking."

"What aren't you telling me, don't give me that fake smile and tell me everything's alright…I want the truth."

He took in another deep breath, "He had to take Donna home…" he began to explain to her what had to happen in order to save her life and he could see the sorrow across her face as he told the story. He hadn't wanted to tell her this, but he couldn't keep up the farce.

"He won't be alone for long, he never is" he said finally as solace. She nodded her head, knowing full well he would find someone to fill the role of companion. She had to keep that thought in her head in order to feel better for his act of sacrifice.

It was the only way she would be able to keep the dark thoughts away. She looked down at John one more time, inspecting his sleeping form. His lips were still puckered as if he was nursing and a small hand was peeking out from the blue blanket he was swaddled in. She surrounded it in her own and marveled at the smallness of it.

"You alright?" the Doctor asked beside her, she hadn't even noticed him get up from his chair.

"I'm alright, just tired I think." He took the baby in his arms and placed her in one of the little plastic bassinets before lifting John from her arms, "get some sleep. You've had a busy day."

"Stay with me?"

"I wouldn't think of leaving Rose, you know that" and he placed a gentle kiss on her head. For the first time in almost a year, Rose slept while the Doctor looked on. He thought about what all had transpired to get him to where he was right now.

He thought about the last good fight he fought before beginning this life. He thought about Rose kissing him on that beach while his ship left them behind. He thought about the life they had been living for the past year and the time they spent living it.

He sat in the chair and watched Rose sleep, something he hadn't been able to do for so long now. A smile crossed his face when he thought about the first time they made love. It was a day much like any other, he still felt like the Doctor, and was hesitant to show her how much he longed for her.

The choice was taken from him when she attacked him one day…

He had been sitting on the couch in their room contemplating on how to create a new sonic screwdriver with what he had in his pockets. He considered himself lucky that he had on one of his suits, the one he wore after he lost Rose.

He liked to call it his blue period, it really was. Things were hectic to say the least, and he was overwhelmed with the feeling of losing Rose had created in him. He felt her standing in front of him and looked up.

They had been sleeping together, just sleeping. He just couldn't bring himself to start anything, though his body was longing to. She reached down and pulled his head up to look at her, her eyes were deep pools of emotion.

Before he could process what emotion that was, she was attacking him. She pulled him up to her by his tie and launched her lips against his while her other hand made its way to his hair. She continued to pull on his tie, towards the bed.

"Rose" he managed to breathe out between heated kisses, his body was already responding to her kisses and he drove his hips into hers without thought. A gasp escaped her lips when she felt his arousal against her stomach. She pressed them together tighter just before he pushed her onto the bed behind her.

He moved his lips from her mouth to trial heated kisses across her jaw and down to her chest, her skin heated under his touch and a guttural moan left her lips.

"Doctor" she panted out as he grabbed the hem of her shirt and began to pull it up. She began to attack his shirt at the same time, their movement becoming frantic as they each sought the feel of skin.

He pulled himself from those thoughts. He really didn't need to get himself too excited right now. Not with a just recovering Rose laying so close and two babies sleeping.

He finally nodded off moments later, managing to shut his mind down long enough for a nap.

**I know you guys probably would have liked for him to relive that moment…that will come later. For now enjoy what is going on between the two, soon we will be transferring to the letter and the Doctor living through those moments while recovering from his time with the Master. **


End file.
